Monday, May 31, 2010

Christina Agave - Anal Bandits 4



Parte 1
Parte 2

Charlotte Stokely - Bangin White Hos 2



Parte 1
Parte 2
Parte 3

Vickie

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The SEX FILES: A DARK XXX PARODY

Anthony Rosano and Kimberly Kane play Mulder and Scully and just as Eric Swiss made the perfect Al Bundy and Rachel Love made the perfect Kitty from The 70s Show, Kimberly Kane was obviously born to play Scully.

I'll skip over the opening scene, since it has a little bit of a twist, but after that scene The Sex Files has the opening credits, including theme music, that are very reminiscent of the original X-Files.

We find Mulder bored and throwing pencils into the ceiling of his office, just as he did on X-Files. Thankfully Mulder and Scully get an assignment - There has been a rash of killings in Los Angeles which have some similarities to ritual and/or Satanic murders and this requires the expertise of Mulder and Scully. After getting their assignment, they leave and we are treated to our first sex scene. The boss summons his secretary and they have sex. How inventive, don't think I've ever seen that......... except for about 100 times.


At the crime scene, we are shown a pretty decent F/X corpse, but then the scene is ruined when a very white sheet with markings was supposedly removed from the victim's body and we are told it was stuffed all the way down to his stomach....doubtful, unless the victim had the cleanest innards of anyone known to man. But Mulder decides this is a sex magic case, and he's off and running. This scene is then followed by Mulder and Scully driving in their car while Mulder advances the plot with some information about the British Occultist Alistair Crowley, and also about Lillith, the Biblical Adam's first wife, who is now an evil demon bitch.

Later that night, Mulder is alone in his room and decides he wants a pizza. Not being able to get Scully to answer, he walks into her room to see if she wants something to eat and finds her coming out of the shower completely naked. Yay! Fanboys shriek in delight...finally Scully nude. Well not actually Scully, but Kimberly Kane looks so much like her with the red wig, who wants to split hairs (pubic or otherwise). After Mulder takes a good long look and is told she has already eaten, he returns to his room. Later that night, we see Mulder watching porn on his TV and here comes the next sex scene in the movie. Wow, how inventive, inserting a porn movie into a porn movie, don't think I've ever seen that...... except for about a 100 times.


The next day Mulder and Scully go see Andrew Barsons (Ralph Long), since he is the supposed leader of a group that is into sex magic, which Barsons denies. Ralph Long drags this scene and the later scene he is in down with his non-acting ability, plus he seems to have the same effect on Mulder and Scully, since all three appear to be reading from cue cards at this point in the movie. Later that night Mulder and Scully go back and examine Barsons' house and find definite clues that prove Barsons was lying and that he does still head up the group.

Next up is a nightclub scene with Audrey Bitoni and Evan Stone on the prowl for an extra woman to take home. They enter the club and since we see no one else around, I either assume that the club has just opened or that this is just a suck-ass club. But as luck would have it (or as twisting the plot to fit would have it) Lilith (Ashlynn Brooke) is there and comes up to Bitoni and Stone and they start having sex right away. Good thing there's not anybody else in the club or this might draw a crowd! But at least our old friend folding chair, who from now on I will call Porno Folding Chair or PFC, as last seen in the elevator in Missionary Position Impossible (click here for review), is in the back ground and we know PFC will be seeing some action before this scene is over. Needless to say, Audrey and Evan wind up dead, as the next scene shows us Mulder looking at two bloody sheets with bodies underneath, which are now outside the club for some odd reason (maybe the light was better for filming!).


At the autopsy, Scully finds that Evan's heart was taken from his body, the word "Fox" carved into it and then it was replaced back into Evan's body. While Scully has been doing the autopsy, Mulder has gone back to Barsons and we find that he has been drugged and tied up - SPOILER ALERT - Scully gets there just in time to save him. After the rescue, we are then treated to another Ralph Long scene as he explains everything that has been going on. This results in a flashback orgy scene..gee, a flashback to insert a sex scene, I've never seen that..... except for about 100 times. The orgy scene is followed by the final non sex scene in The Sex Files and I won't reveal it for those who haven't seen the movie, but there is a morph scene here with F/X equal to any non-XXX production you will most likely see. I even rewound the movie at this point to look at the scene again to see if I could tell how they did it.


After reporting back to headquarters, Scully and Mulder go their separate ways. Mulder comes over to Scully's later that night and tells her he's always bummed out and thinking about his sister (this refers back to the original series) but he has thought over what is really important to him. This leads to (Fanboys start shrieking) Mulder and Scully having sex. Ok, once again, it's not really Scully, but who wants to split red hairs!

I thought this was one of the better XXX takes on a regular TV show, since the characters and the plot both remained true to the original spirit of The X-Files. The direction and writing by Sam Hain was top-notch and I hope to see his name attached to some future projects. Sure there's some hackneyed plot points that are used in order to get a couple of the sex scenes inserted, but they mainly stand out because the rest of the movie is so well plotted; and even taking into account Ralph Long's bad dramatic acting ( his sitcum acting is much better), he mainly stands out since everyone else does such a good job, so it's easy to rate this one an A-

The Sex Files: A Dark XXX Parody starring Aurora Snow, Anthony Rosano, Charley Chase, Audrey Bitoni, Kimberly Kane, Ashlynn Brooke, Ralph Long, Gracie Glam, Pike Nelson, Jackie Daniels, Angelica Raven, Evan Stone, Rod Fontana and written and directed by Sam Hain

Sunday, May 30, 2010

Kassey Kristal & Courtney

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Camilla Ken - Amateur HD



Parte 1
Parte 2

PIPE DREAMS

Take a pinch of David Stanley (the writer) and a pinch of Paul Thomas (the director) add in some Manuel Ferrara and Janine (the actors) and what do you get? One Hell of A Bad Movie.

The first two sex scenes in Pipe Dreams revolve around Manuel doing plumbing jobs. In the first scene there's a couple having sex almost right next to Manuel (there was a curtain dividing them). Guess they had to do something to pass the time while the plumbing was being fixed. The next scene finds Manuel doing a plumbing job at an S/M club and the owner can't pay him, so he lets Manuel watch some kinky sex. Usually in a porno it's the plumber who is having the sex, but I guess David Stanley and Paul Thomas really wanted to show how creative they are and turn the story upside down. (That last sentence is NOT to be taken seriously.)

Manuel's brother Paul Thomas makes XXX movies (wow, what a casting choice, wonder how he got that part). Yes, you read correctly, for some strange reason, Paul and Manuel are brothers, even though Manuel has an accent that you can barely understand.... maybe they're foster brothers.... or maybe they're soul brothers...no I don't think that could be it.....hell, just make up your own reason, since there's no logic behind it and I'm tired of thinking about it. Anyway, Manuel wants to meet a woman and the brothers come up with a plan for a fake porn movie. Manuel will do the casting and that will allow him to meet women. Oh yeah, let's not forget that Manuel also has to write the script for the movie. Hey! Manuel just write down all the things you have seen as a plumber....the script will be done in no time.

Manuel's first audition is going to be Janine, even though Paul Thomas doesn't think she can act. Before she arrives at the fake casting, Paul and Manuel watch a tape of Janine. I'm sure this had to be in the script, since it is a recurring (and cheating in my opinion) way that David Stanley includes a sex scene in a movie without having to write plot. Manuel and Janine really click with each other, plus the script that Manuel wrote turns out to be so good that Paul decides to really shoot the movie.

Manuel finds out that Janine is on the kinky S/M side and Pipe Dreams takes a turn to this kinky side for the rest of the movie. I've read that Pipe Dreams was a take on a Japanese horror movie, so I'm guessing that what happens to Manuel near the end of the movie is the horror part....the horror part for me was sitting through an hour and half of this lousy movie. I rate this one a solid D

Pipe Dreams starring Melissa Lauren, Justine Joli, Austin Kincaid, Venus, Janine, Paul Thomas, Sofia Sandobar, Manuel Ferrara, Jerry, Steven St. Croix and directed by Paul Thomas.

Brynn Tyler - 18 Years Old



Parte 1
Parte 2

Brynn Tyler - Brother vs Brother 17/01/08



Parte 1
Parte 2

Saturday, May 29, 2010

Friday, May 28, 2010

RENDEZVOUS

I haven't had much luck with David Stanley movies. While nothing has been bad, I've only seen one (Carmen Goes South) that I felt was anything more than average. Rendezvous is no exception, but it does have some of the better adult actors involved in the production: Carmen Hart, Randy Spears, and Eric Masterson.

Rendezvous begins with Randy Spears going on a business trip and we find that he is married to Jamie Huxley, who cares nothing for Randy. When Randy arrives at his hotel (which appears to be in some Third World Country), he is greeted by Eric Masterson, an insane desk clerk. Eric Masterson shows us he can get his crazy on with the best of them (i.e. Steven St. Croix). At first Eric tells Randy that he doesn't have a room for him, but eventually agrees to give him a room.

Randy can't get his wife on the phone and we see that she is busy having sex with Barrett Blade. Randy falls asleep and dreams that a lovely woman is rubbing her feet and legs all over him. Much to his surprise, when he awakes he finds Carmen Hart is in his bed. It seems that this is her room and she freaks out finding Randy in her bed and kicks him out.

Randy tries to deal with the insane desk clerk again but only gets sent back to share the room with Carmen, who for some reason, now doesn't object. On his return to the room, Randy finds Carmen is watching a porno on the TV and he watches along with her. This is a porn plot that I always consider a cheating way of inserting another sex scene in the movie without using any plot and I have seen David Stanley use this in some of his other movies.

The plot of Rendezvous really started to bog down to me at this point, since it turned mainly into a succession of sex scenes: The next morning when Randy awakes he finds Carmen having sex with the maid, when they move to the bed, Randy leaves for the dining room; in the dining room Randy sees another couple getting hot and heavy with each other and he leaves (only in pornos do people have sex in a dining room occupied by other people......unless I've just been going to the wrong restaurants); then after that sex scene finishes, next up is a sex scene between Carmen and Eric Masterson.

Rendezvous finally gets back on track and turns itself into a romance between Carmen and Randy. The movie has a little bit of a twist ending, which I won't reveal here. I did enjoy the movie, but a lot of that had to do with having three strong XXX actors who were able to carry a humorous but weak and flimsy plot. I grade this one a C

Rendezvous starring Mika Tan, Talon, Carmen Hart, Joanna Angel, Stephanie Tripp, Jamie Huxley, Randy Spears, Eric Masterson, Chris Cannon, Barrett Blade and directed by David Stanley

Simi

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Tuesday, May 25, 2010

Gekkoninae - HQ Photos

17 JPG | 8 MB | 2950x2094
http://hotfile.com/dl/44815629/bb3b5ab/Gekkoninae.zip.html

Sophia Latjuba is thingking of deleting her twitter account

Sophia Latjuba is thingking of deleting her twitter account. But Why?

Sophia Latjuba is thingking of deleting her twitter account

Brianna Love - 50 to 1 #2



Bajar

Bree Olson - 1000 Facials



Bajar

Chaunce Hayden asks, ARE THEY WORTH IT?

No,not his hair plugs. He is letting it shine the last we heard. He is asking is Howard and the gang worth the money they are getting in his latest Steppin Out Column. Check it out.

Turtles - HQ Photos

11 JPJ | 9 MB | 2950x2094
http://hotfile.com/dl/44753731/789af37/Turtles.zip.html

Bambi

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CSI Miami: A XXX Parody

CSI Miami: A XXX Parody
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Cast: Jessica Jaymes, Monica Mayhem, Tabitha Stevens
A CSI Crime Lab is exploding with Sperm! There is sperm everywhere at the studio where a Miami photographer fucks his model to the point of exhaustion. The lab technicians mount a series of sexual recreations to test their theories on the sperm trajectories.
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You Want To Fuck Me Where?

You Want To Fuck Me Where?

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Cast: Summer Collins, Kiki Morgan, Nikki Starr, Patra
Summer, in her latest movie shoot, is waiting to get a good reaming. To her suprise it's her big fuzzy bear, Ron Jeremy. But can she handle Ron's fat cock up her ass? Find out for yourself in another John T. Bone sex flick, and see where Summer gets fucked!

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